Thankful, Thankful and Thankful

On Wednesday morning, sitting in a hospital bed, I heard the scariest news about myself I’ve ever heard.  I had suffered from a small stroke.

It all started Saturday night after my 5k mud run.  I begin having a headache and a sore neck.  Of course I thought nothing of this b/c of the activities of the day, I figured I was just sore from the run.  On Sunday, the headaches worsened and the sore neck became sorer and stiffer.  On Monday, I could barely turn my neck and had to keep taking Tylenol for the headaches.  Also, Monday night I had an episode where I felt like I was in a barrel with very loud ringing in my ears and an episode of seeing flashes of light.  I really didn’t think a whole lot about it…I though maybe I had some sinus stuff going on causing it.  I went into work on Tuesday and pushed thru the day.  I felt whinny to my clients and hated that I had to tell them I wasn’t feeling well, I usually try to hide it if I don’t feel well.  I hadn’t been home to long that evening and I went out to the car to get something, when I came in, I lost my balance walking, my head was dizzy and felt like I was blacking out.  Chris came and grabbed me and called my Mom to come stay with the boys so he could take me to the ER.  He got me set down on the couch and my right side went numb and tingly and I really panicked when I realized I could not swallow.  I just begin to lay hands on myself and call out for Jesus to help me!  Chris panicked too and called 911.  It was such a scary moment.  By the time my Mom got there, I was able to swallow but was still experiencing numbness on my right side….I looked at my Mom and said, “I can’t open my eye”  I thought maybe it was bells palsy.  I had another episode of not being able to swallow before the paramedics got there.  So Scary.  When the paramedics arrived I was feeling my right side again and could swallow so I felt crazy that there was 2 ambulances, a fire truck, and about 10 first responders standing in my living room surrounding me…CRAZY!  I refused to be taken by ambulance to the hospital so when they left…Chris took me against my will.  yes. I am stubborn. 

Once we were at the ER, everyone knows….that is a process.  During that process, I was back in the triage and they needed me to give a urine sample.  I stood up from getting my sample and that is when the second episode hit.  I became very dizzy and felt like I was getting ready to black out…I got to the door and hollered out for Chris…he came running and a nurse came behind him.  They grabbed me as I couldn’t stand on my own anymore and quickly got me into a wheelchair and into a room.  All I can remember is that I was scared.  Once I calmed down and came to..I tried to talk but my words came out jumbled..the right side of my body was tingling and I didn’t have control of my movements.They ran a CT test and it came back negative so they wanted to keep me so they could do a MRI that next morning.  By that time…my sisters and Mom had come and I couldn’t get my thoughts together to tell them what had happened, Chris had to do all my talking.   Against my will, I was admitted to a room and had to stay the night.  They took me down early the next morning for an MRI and within a couple hours, the DR came in and told me that I had suffered from a small stroke.  I was in total disbelief.  How can this be?  I am young and healthy…the worst thing I ever do to my health is eat fast food!! Let’s just say…Kim had a pity party all that day.  I didn’t mean to..but I just couldn’t get a hold of my emotions and it was just a dark day in my mind (real hard to explain).  I had to have more test run that day so they could determine what kind of stroke I had suffered…then the next morning I had and echocardiogram with a bubble test to determine if my heart threw off a clot that caused the stroke.  Thankfully, it came back good so they were able to determine that the stroke was caused by a dissection (tear) in my carotid artery. My prognosis…Coumadin for the next 3-6 months to keep my blood thin.  I am currently still in the hospital on I V and Heparin  but I’m going to be just fine.

I have been overwhelmed by all the love that has been shown to me thru this time.  I’m going to try to list everything I’m thankful for b/c I don’t ever want to forget!

• My husband…I can’t say enough about him…he has barely left my side and has been my rock thru this time.  If it wasn’t for him…I would not be getting the treatment I needed to get better. He has been at my every beck and call he is amazing and I love him with all my heart.
• My Boys…when I first heard that I had a stroke….all I could think about was how precious Life was and how from that point on…I would embrace it even stronger.  I thought of how lucky we all are to spend the majority of our days healthy and to have each other.  Being in a hospital bed just changes your whole outlook on life…BIG Time!  I try to always live each day to the fullest but I still take so much for granted.  I am SO Thankful to have two healthy boys and I am so thankful for every day that I have here on this earth to be their Mommy.  I Love them so much!
• My family….oh my goodness, where do I start!  It says a lot about a family when I don’t have to worry about my boys.  My Mom, Dad, Joy, Kevin, Caine, Tori, Laura, and Nate have all been angels that looked after them.  Even bringing them to the hospital so that I could see them everyday.  I just can’t thank my family enough for all they have done.  Laura and Nathan  had plans to go to the beach but cancelled them to be here for me and the boys. Gerald and Brenda have been so great to us and are also there for us for what ever we need.  I’m so thankful for wonderful in-laws!
• Friends…I am overwhelmed by all the love I have been shown thru phone calls, visits,cards, flowers, food, gifts and messages. I could truly feel the prayers that everyone was praying. From my bad day on Wednesday to a much better day on Thursday…prayer was the difference.  I had two visits from 2 different Pastors from Laura’s church.. they had never met me, so for them to take time out of their day to come and visit me was very touching.  I am so thankful for friends who are there for me and wanting to do whatever they can do to help.
• Christian Nurses and Hospital Workers…I am blown away by the witnesses for Christ that this hospital has.  I know that in this day in time..it is not “popular” to speak the name “Jesus” to someone of whom you have no idea what their faith is.  I have had at least 4-5 caregivers to give me the encouraging words of how good God is and reminding me to just call on his name when I was scared.  One nurse told me, “Just Say Jesus”.  Even though I am a believer…it was so comforting to hear and reminded me that he is ALWAYS with me!
• Doctors and Technology…I am thankful that we live in a day and time that when something is wrong…the technology is there to figure it out.  I am also thankful that God called people to be Doctors and gave them such a smart mind to be able to help others.
• The Little Things in Life…. Like I said…sometimes we start taking our day in and day out for granted.  The little things in life really are the big things.  I hope from this day forward that I never forget to Thank God for every single thing in my life..and I hope that I can always slow life down enough (without being in a hospital bed) to recognize all  the blessings that  God has put before me.

I am currently at this very moment (4:36 p.m.) thankful that I have not had to take any headache medicine since last night at 10:00.  God Is Good!!

I know this is a long one but It is also an important one.  So often we forget what God brings us thru and I don’t ever want to forget.  I know I have not recollected everything in this post but I pray that as God brings things to my remembrance that I can come back to this post and update it.  I just feel beyond blessed and I am so THANKFUL!!!!